Pamela Cummins provides insight to our readers about dealing with unhealthy relationships.

Hi Pamela,

I read some of your work, which was forwarded by a friend, and it makes so much sense. 

I know you receive a lot of emails, but I thought I would try because I am at a crossroad in my life and have to make a decision. Which I am not so sure of and I’m not moving on either. 

My husband and I recently separated. I am not sure whether to divorce this person or wait and give it time. We haven’t spoken to each other in so many years, even during the relationship. Is there another person out there for me?

Frieda

Hi Frieda:

Thank you for reading the column! I’m hearing the song “If I Can‘t Have You” by Yvonne Elliman, then a loud scratch sound that is made by someone moving the record player needle across an album. My guides are saying, “It’s time to move on, your relationship hasn’t worked in years, why would it now?” With that, I got a vision of a man sitting in a recliner chair and not moving. Your husband doesn’t want to change for you or anyone else; therefore, your relationship will stay the same.

To answer your question if there is another person out there for you: I heard yes, then a large church bell rings, and I get a vision of a couple dancing wearing old-fashioned clothes. What that means is there is another committed relationship, you both have similar values, and you may have known each other before. When you two meet, or become a couple, is within in a year or a couple of years. Your energy feels as though you have done work on yourself, which brings in a mate quickly. Continue to work on yourself. Most likely, your husband will become involved in a relationship sooner than you; however, the relationship will not be as healthy or happy as yours.

Blessings,
Pamela

Dear Pamela:

I’ve been in a tumultuous relationship for two years. I was drawn to heal him of a rip in his soul right around his heart.  My mental connection with him is unreal–I can feel him from 100 miles away. We are either exactly the same or exactly opposite, depending on what characteristics you are looking at. About a year and a half in, I developed the same ruptured disc in my neck that he had–but he refused treatment for his, and I got surgery to fix mine.  I also believe this happened to show him how to heal, to give him confidence.   

He holds me at arm’s length on many fronts.  We do a lot of things together, but I have yet to meet most of his family that are 20 miles away from us.  He has met all of my family. He is a good soul, I believe, but suffering from past hurts, which I think I’m here to lead him through.  So many times, though, I’ve been ready to throw up my hands.  It’s like we have this irresistible force bringing us together.  He is struggling with his medical situation, as his pain has gotten very, very bad since my neck problem happened.  He is trying to figure out how to proceed medically. I’m trying to decide if I’m meant to continue to lead him through this, or whether enough is enough.   

Do you have any input on this? 

From,
MaryAnn

Hi MaryAnn:

I’m hearing the Stevie Nicks’ song “Nothing Ever Changes,” and that there is no wrong or right choice to stay or leave, only your choice. Although, don’t expect him to change – your acceptance of him, without trying to change him is the key. Please remember that you are not only the teacher in the relationship, but the student, too.

I’m also guided to pull a few oracle cards from the Doreen Virtue deck “The Romance Angels.”

I got four oracle cards: romantic feelings, forgiving and learning, honeymoon, and let go of control issues.

Let me explain these cards for you to get a better understanding. You both have love for each other that is worth exploring, yet there is also much to learn about each other. To help both of your neck problems, it is important that neither of you not expect the other person to be who you want them to be, nor should either think your way is the only way. Necks are all about being flexible, while seeing the other person’s point of view. This is where the forgiving of each other and yourselves comes in. For the relationship to flourish to a higher level of commitment, be like honeymooners – enjoy the time together and have fun! Focus on the positive instead of the negative.

Blessings,
Pamela

Please send your love and relationship questions to pamelabellesprit@gmail.com Pamela Cummins is the author of Psychic Wisdom on Love and Relationships, Insights for Singles: Steps to Find Everlasting Love, the FREE eBook Pamela’s Love Collection, and Learn the Secret Language of Dreams. To learn more and get your free gifts, please visit www.pamelacummins.com