How To Lose A Client In 10 Days Or Less

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Does connecting to your clients sometimes feel like a struggle? Some days they love your stuff and other days it seems they are completely turned off.

The professional relationships you form with clients are a mirror image to ALL of the relationships in your life.  Of course, different types of relationships require different levels and displays of emotion, but you can bet that when you market to your client, the more “into” the relationship you are, the more receptive and giving they will be.

Here are the 7 deadly areas where a lot of business owners dampen the relationship.

1. You never talk to me anymore – Who are you marketing to?
Not knowing exactly who your ideal client is will surely leave you speaking a different language.  In order to be completely successful when promoting your business, you must have a crystal clear definition of EXACTLY who your audience is. This is your niche market. It stands to reason if you are unclear about WHO you serve, then you will certainly not talk to them.
Once you find your niche, ask yourself the following questions to help you relate better to them:
• What are their struggles?
• What are their fears?
• What motivates them?
• Can they afford you?
• What results are they looking for?
• What is it costing them (emotionally) to stay stuck?
2. You’re taking me for granted – What kind of relationship are you building with your clients?
Every interaction we have with people is a relationship. Different relationships require different kinds of attention. You cannot simply assume your clients will love you – you must put your whole heart and soul into the connection.
There is an adjustment period for all relationships and the one you have with your client is no different. If it is a brand new relationship and you are still in the honeymoon phase, it’s all hearts and flowers, constant “touches via e-zine and special offers”; BUT, if it’s an older relationship are you certain the foundation is strong enough to weather the reality of who each of you is?
To build a strong marketing relationship there are a few MUST DO’s:
• Follow the vision of your business
• Stay true to your brand in EVERYTHING you say
• Always focus on the RESULTS when communicating with your clients about the issues they’re facing
3. I feel alone in this relationship – How often do you connect to your client base?
Size does not matter when it comes to the number of people on your list.  What does matter is how often you are reaching out.
Reaching out just to reach out is never an option. You must have relevant information to prove you have a valid reason for connecting.
4. I love you, I’m just not in love with you – How are you measuring the level of satisfaction your clients have with you?
When you decided to become a business owner, you also decided to put your clients’ needs before your own.  What I mean by that is that all your efforts must be focused on providing the RESULTS your clients are looking for.  People buy results to problems they are experiencing. In order to keep the love relationship thriving with your client, you must routinely evaluate the message that you are sending out by asking your clients specifically how satisfied they are with you and your services.
Each person’s degree of satisfaction is relative to the problem they are experiencing and the effectiveness of the results you are providing. The ONLY way to continue the relationship is to feed their needs.
5. I think we should see other people – Are you pushing your clients into someone else’s business?
The quickest way to push your clients into the arms of another provider is to subconsciously undermine yourself.  Thoughts are energy and what you focus your thoughts on COMES BACK TO YOU – The moral is to be mindful of your thoughts.
When you have fear-based thoughts, it will be fear-based energy that permeates your circle.
Do any of these sound familiar:
• I worry that I don’t have enough knowledge to own my business.
• I am not disciplined enough to work for myself.
• I’m fearful that I won’t be able to balance my life and business.
• I’m afraid there will be no one to support me.
• I’m not good enough.
These are all examples of the story you tell yourself. You MUST release your story before you can be truly successful.
Steps to Overcoming Beliefs
• Identify your belief – notice it showing up in your physical body
• Feel it in your body – what does it literally feel like? Notice the literal physical feeling
• Accept – be with it as the observer. Allow the feeling to be.
Create the Shift – Look inside to connect to an issue/challenge/belief
Ask yourself the following:
• Is it true? Really feel into it.
• What does this belief cost me?
• Who would I be without this belief?
• How can I make the opposite of this belief be truth?
6. You just don’t get me – It’s not what you say, but how you say it. 
If you are going to take the time to sit and “talk” to your clients and prospective clients, then having a consistent plan and language that you speak to them with will greatly increase their commitment to you.
The old adage, “It’s not what you say, but how you say it,” really applies when it comes to speaking to your following. People are looking for results that will make their troubles go away.  Immerse yourself in your client’s world. Know them inside and out; what makes them tick, what keeps them awake at night, what are their innermost fears and desires. Once you get acquainted with all of those points, you will be able to sit down and converse in a successful and profitable way.
7. You are emotionally unavailable – Are you holding back when it comes to telling your clients who you are?
All relationships are a reflection of the relationship you have with yourself.  It stands to reason if you aren’t giving yourself what you need to be fulfilled and joyful, chances are you will struggle with meeting your clients’ expectations.
You were born into a story that was created specifically for you.  If you’re a boy, we’ll call you Bobby, if you’re a girl, we’ll call you Sally, and so the storytelling begins.  Your family of origin, although well intended, has a major impact on the stories you tell in present day.  Inevitably, you begin to believe all the stories.  Until you actually stop and listen to the stories you tell, you are helpless to re-frame them, or re-write them.
I invite you to sit with yourself and drop into your story. Maybe you have one story that overflows more than another. Perhaps, you find yourself feeling not good enough, or you feel you are too ____________.  Whatever your story is, I can tell you with 100% certainty that it is just that, a fabricated piece of untruth. If you truly believe you are what you came from, The Source, then how can you be anything other than whole and complete exactly as you are?
On a human level, here is an exercise for you to sit with and begin to re-write your modern-day story.
Finish the following sentences with as many answers as you can.
I am:
Life is:
The world is:
Men are:
Women are:
What evidence can you find that suggests that your negative beliefs about yourself may NOT be true?
What evidence can you find that suggests your negative beliefs about the world and others may not be true?
 My personal and professional evolution has come about as a result of following this advice. I have found that as I strengthen my own personal relationships I am naturally strengthening my professional relationships as well.

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Occasional contributors to Bellesprit Magazine between 2011 – 2013.

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